Friday, 11 March 2011

Something a bit different...

Not to go off the topic on my search for success blog but I really have been irritated beyond belief and need to vent. Not only have I had to put up with the below but I've also been censored by a publication I contribute to as to not rock the boat.

Not written here for a while as things are going pretty well, maybe this is the start of being successful at something else...

Following a few failed attempts at nights on the town with my friends I'm getting increasingly more and more fed up with the treatment, which could be perceived as heterophobia, that goes on in a particular bar group in Soho... Yes you G-A-Y. All I want is to paint the town pink and show my straight friends a good time, but no.

The bar group which is the shining beacon of hope for some gay guys, offering them sanctuary from the scary heterosexual bar world whilst they discover who they are has not once but three times turned away a group of my friends and I in the last fortnight. Purely me speculating as not to incite any legal comeback but purely because the group did not consist of solely of gay men. It saddens me that I can't enjoy a night out without worrying we'll get turned away, based on the fact some members of the group don't look 'gay' enough.

I have known this happen regularly amongst other groups of mixed sexuality friends. Even a group of my lesbian friends were turned away from Late for some unknown reason... Back to your underground hideaway at G-A-Y bar girls.

Let's not forget the slight media uproar that G-A-Y generated, they turned away screaming hetero female fans of One Direction when they performed at G-A-Y Heaven post X-Factor which caused a few publications to question door policy. The more this happens the more negative press you will generate, we work so hard to promote acceptance and show that we are a tolerant LGBT community, if you start causing too much of a stir from your door policies then you will undo all of this work. Imagine your stance if you were turned away from a straight club because you weren't 'a member'.

To be fair, one of the occasions we were turned away I can accept, as I was the only gay guy with two, albeit questionable, hetero men and four hetero females. I accept the stance that it is a gay bar and a place for gay men and lesbians to feel comfortable, I also accept G-A-Y have to protect the welfare of their customers to a degree. Having the door policy there is to protect the patrons from harm, I guarantee if a couple of skinhead homophobes went in looking trouble they wouldn't get out in one piece that's for sure. The times I take issue with are when the group is split with lesbians, gay guys and a couple of straight females - we were met with the usual line of 'members only'. I'm not saying my friends look like flaming queens and the lesbians like the stereotypical bull dykes perpetuated on screen, but we are clearly of the gay variety. The two hetero girls looked mortified and thought that they were the reason we couldn't get in. My question is, how did the delightful door staff, and manager, once summoned for an ear bending, not know we weren't all gay?

We were expected to return on a Sunday night, fill in an application, show our passports and receive a membership card. Now this I also take issue with, for three reasons. Firstly, I get up at crack of dawn to go to the gym and go to work, this is the focus of my life, not being gay and putting money behind the bar. I do not want to have to drag myself into town at 11pm just to apply for a gay ID card on the one night they allow members to join. Secondly, how do we know that we won't all get down there and be turned away again? Thirdly, I do not want to carry around a card just to prove that I'm gay, which let's be honest is the whole point of the card application process. It's disgusting and hidden behind the facade of membership.

Not one to ever be told no and give up on a night out, we eventually gave up and went to Ku bar in Lisle Street, the door staff were lovely and didn't give a hoot we had straight girls with us, they laughed and joked with us until we staggered out at 3am. Clearly the bar with the better policy. Clearly the bar where I will be taking my friends and my money from now on.

Now to my point - Listen up G-A-Y! This is an early warning to you as I can smell something a-brewing. I'm not the only person with the lucky opportunity to publicly write about my experiences with your door staff. Nor does it give me a sense of joy to bring to light your somewhat militant ways of dealing with your unwanted clientele. Someone with an even bigger public following than me may be met with the same problem, they may wish to turn this into a bigger issue for you in a very public arena. Stories on the LGBT community are on the press agenda a lot more these days as we continue to fight for equality, especially on subjects of tolerance and homophobia. If you want to be seen to be a leader then change policies and accept the fact that groups of friends will include a couple of straight people who want to spend time with their gay friends. They aren't Nazi fanatics, they aren't BNP members, they aren't part of any other group wishing our community harm... How do I know this? Well I doubt they'd be hanging around a group of gay guys and lesbians if they were, do you?

I implore you to change and accept our heterosexual friends or you run the risk of becoming dated and archaic in your beliefs.

Tuesday, 30 November 2010

I really need to blog more....

... I'm becoming really lax at this... meh no one reads it unless I mention a client and it pops up on Google search feeds.

2 months to condense in one quick blog... I've realised I spend the majority of my life drunk, at a party or being driven home in a car... I think I need to have a word with myself and sort this hot mess out.

Thankfully I only have the temptation of 16 more nights ahead of me in London before heading home for Xmas 'detox' at home, pfft yeah right.

Highlights -

Drunk with Beige Magazine

Drunk for SLAM's 4th birthday

Drunk the Henry Holland for Roxy Party

Drunk at Chase & Status for Q Awards

Drunk at Mark Ronson for Q Awards

20 hour work day for Q Awards and (drunken) afterparty

Gig with Kelis

Lowlights -

All the hangovers

I'm really struggling for random chat right now as I have nothing to talk about, I don't even like being in my own head so why would you want to be... I'm off men for the time being as they are all arses, I'm concentrating on work... well I suppose I'm mostly concentrating on growing this beer belly which is getting quite unsightly to be honest. Suppose I could chat about my envy of - my good friend who is dating again, being the socially inept convotard she is provides me with lots of jealousy and laughs.

I could chat about my dull date from last week... I went on a date, drank soda, talked about nothing but me as we had nothing in common and went home... oooh scandal... I miss the days where I was snogging and dating trashy gossip columnists. All I do now is drool over One Direction in a quite pervy way on X Factor and try and avoid the sex pests on Grindr and Qrushr.

Oh I was in Reveal Magazine - another highlight

Me and the housemate-wife have been planning for 2011 as we did this time last year, we hit all the targets so pretty good end to the year. 2011 is so far looking like -

Finally Quiting smoking - With the help of the Weber Nicorette patch case study I'm doing.

Get in shape- can't reveal the reason just yet but it's pretty much 20 weeks until I get to do something so amazing.

Get a promotion - mo money and mo rungs up that ladder.

Visit LA.

Go skiing for the first time.

I could say find a fella but I found 2 in 2010 and they were both bastards.

I'm bored now.... Bye

Sunday, 3 October 2010

so where to begin...

.... not quite sure as to where I left off, mostly because I can't be arsed to read the last drivvel I wrote... at a guess it was doom, gloom, single life and being undervalued in a PR sweatshop. So fast forward to today, sat watching Sex and the City, drinking vodka, still smoking 1/2 stone lighter (due to a tropical bug - we'll get to that)

I now work at SLAM PR, the most amazing agency on the planet, beautiful, friendly people... and the best clients ever. Russian Standard Vodka, Nespresso & W Retreat & Spa Maldives, Koh Samui and Bali. Que bottomless flow of vodka, enough coffee to sink a ship and the amazing opporunity to see some of the most beautiful countries on the planet.

So we have been through 2.. no 3 boys since you last read this crap, Tabloid boy, Sainsburys boy and a short lived fling with one who shall remain nameless. so love life still very much on the MIA list.

Book is 90% finished and in the hands of a very good friend of mine, approaching a literary agent in December so fingers croseed for a summer release.

I've had the opportunity to work on some amazing events and talent and it isn't showing signs of stopping.

Basically to turn this gushing into a point, dont give up on your dream you will get there, surround yourself with positive people, nurturing friends and never give up... what else I learnt is to get rid of the negative influences in your lives, however hard it is to say goodbye to some people, for the sake of your own sanity it needs to be done,

Things to work on for the next year - find me a group of gays as sorry girls its been fun over the years but i need people on my level, i need to add to my laughs with you and include some homo time to chat about boys you dont understand.

Get a promotion

Carry on being happy and helping others to live their dreams as I am.

That is the round up... coming up we have 6 nights of Q Awards events with Paolo Nutini, Mark Ronson, Kelis, Paloma Faith and The Hoosiers... becomming a coffee tasting pro... missing out on a trip to the Maldives due to Q Awards... *sob*... and who knows...

I'm back, I'm happy and still pickled in vodka...



Wednesday, 22 September 2010

Return of the.....

.... DIVA!!!!!!

Following my ridiculous journey in to the depths of PR hell I have returned... slightly more successful but far more fabulous.

So much to download from brain to blog....

to be continued....

Friday, 5 February 2010

Service will resume shortly....

.... give me until April and we'll be up and running, I have no time to myself right now...

Sunday, 20 September 2009

Life, Love & Loss in the big city

When the new year rolled in and I'd finished my annual, 'I will still love you for the rest of my life' phonecall with an old ex who I only speak to twice a year, one being the aformentioned admission of undying love, the other when one of us needs to return to a stable emotional point of reference...

... anyway... after said phonecall I decided this would be my year... 2009 the year of D'vyne... I proclaimed to one and all this would be my time in the spotlight. I experienced what has been the most random and eye opening 9 months of the past few years ( Uni and Thailand being the others)

I decided this blog would be about my rise to success and all I was doing to push it along, well I am somewhere, just not where I wanted to be. By now I wanted to have registered my company and be doing little freelance projects... can't afford to do that and I don't have the time so that's on hold...

Lee was supposed to be flying high on the back of New Moon... she kinda is... on the official Australian movie launch tour and been asked to submit an original piece for the next movie...

and the book... oh the book which i have been writing for a year, have nearly finished but due to my own insecurities am actually refusing to... I still have about 10,000- 20,000 more words to write... so things arent really going to plan...

Over the weekend I had a mini epiphany as last Thursday my great gran died, she was the head of our family for 89 years, a head strong, powerful force who never let anything get her down she lived through a war to which she lost a husband, mothered 7 children I think one which she lost in the 80s, and watched the world around her change beyond recognition.

The hour before I found out she died, the person I was supposedly in a relationship with decided that 'nah' a relationship wasn't for him anymore, and ended it via the wonderful medium of text, purely because he hates confrontation... slightly bitter? yes... as i should have finished with him weeks ago when I caught him texting his ex saying how much he missed him... but me being me forgave him as I said at the beginning I always go back to my ex as a point of reference when im emotionally unsure or scared... the unforgivable part is all of the other guys he was texting behind my back, the ones he thought i never knew about, texting one person is forgiveable, but he must have some serious issues if all he needs is constant validation from a string of strangers that he is attractive, wanted and cared about.

All I showed was my affection and support and I guess he is just too damaged to accept that someone was beginning to fall in love with him for who he was (i dont fall easily, he is just one of those guys you do fall for) and all i wanted was to show him how happy i could make him... i'll stop gushing now im actually making myself sick... so we broke up and I spent a couple of days in bed feeling sorry for myself and when i wasn't in bed, very very drunk.

Until I realised did my gt gran ever lie in bed moping, did she let the loss of a husband and daughter get her down and give up. No it's not the way my family genetics work, we pick ourselves up and get on with it in a very British way...

All i feel is sorry for said guy now, he'll never know trust and happiness because he is too scared to let go and risk opening up to the possible hurt but he's also stopping himself being loved unconditionally, he's currently deflecting his emotions on to a new flat and using more new people to distract him from his unhappiness, im sure when the glamour wears off he may be ready at 25 to sit and look at himself... or start the cycle all over again...

I'm biting the bullet and finishing my book before xmas, even if it isnt any good, at least i put my mind to something and wrote the story everyone has inside of them down on paper. Im also going to help Lee in anyway I can to focus her song writing ability and produce the best song she can for submission and live her dream of having her message heard...and finally one day I'm going to live my dream... have my own agency, do PR, MY way and see the world doing the job I love.... whilst hopefully finding the one im supposed to be with...

Apologies for the vent blog but i just needed to write it down... most of the raw emotion went into the book which surprisingly has a section on someone being dumped the day their gran dies... who knew 6 months ago i wasnt just writing my past in the book but my future too... scary huh? Difference is the guys get back together... I doubt that will be happening in this case... unfortunately.

oh and London is still sucking the life and money out of me, i've just come to learn that what you can't change accept but make sure the things you can change, you do!

Saturday, 12 September 2009

Saturday night in London...

... and I'm watching The Devil Wears Prada for inspiration...

I'm finding it increasingly difficult to balance work life and actually having a life of my own...

I find myself thinking about work all the time, worrying I've forgotten to do something, worrying I will forget to do something... not having enough time in the day to juggle all of the demands which are thrown my way from 4 directors and an MD, this wouldn't be a problem if there was middle management to catch all the whims and demands that fly my way. Alas there is me, lowly publicist and the next rung up directors, no snr publicist no acc manager.... I find it hard to manage my time at the best of it let alone be doing the work of a publicist,then occasionally the work of a snr publicist/manager and oh yeah director...

now im not saying I dont like the challenge, but then when im asked why haven't I done MY work they seem to forget the other tasks besides my own that i was set with...

I know we are in a recession and I should be thankful of the opportunity but I'm 3 months in to a job where i'm expected to know everything which would take me at least a year to learn.

I'm struggling to make the transition, I know i'm digging my heels in due to the fact they pay me nothing and I cant afford to eat.... but my stubborness may end up costing me....

oh the decisions of life... and like The Devil Wears Prada I need to decide whether I want a career or not... and at what cost?